Angel.

I suddenly feel like I really want to tell you something that's been on my mind for a while now. We all wonder what the point of our lives is, right? Like what our purpose is or whatever. Have you ever felt like you are here to be there for other people?
I sometimes wonder if guardian angels are actually like human beings, who have been brought to life to look after those they come to love in whatever way they can. 
I know it may seem stupid, but sometimes I feel like that's the only reason I'm here. I always try to accept people for who they are, and I have a massive desire to help them. This ridiculous idea of mine isn't helped by the frequent dreams supporting it.
I feel this especially with Gloves. I don't believe in accidents, I think everything happens for a reason. I definitely believe Gloves and I were supposed to meet. Plus we have the same name, ridiculously similar personalities and our mothers share the same name too. 
When Gloves is upset, I feel like I've failed. Like it's my fault even if no-one could see a way that I could have prevented it from happening. When she's in pain or crying, I want to take it all away, and into me if I have to. It makes more sense for me to be in pain than her. Before you start thinking that I'm in love with her or something - I say this because sometimes people feel like that last bit when they're in love - I'm really not. I love her as a friend, but I am certainly not in love with her. I'm not gay or bi - yes I do know for sure. Plus I think I'm falling in love with someone else.
Gloves often says that I'm like the glue holding our friend groups together, or something like that. I've never felt like that myself. I've often felt the furthest away from them all, certainly not the thing holding them all together.
So yeah. You officially think I'm insane. No, I don't believe I'm an angel or something - I just think my purpose is something similar to that of a guardian angel - I'm just here to help.

This is one of my favourite pictures of Gloves and I. Naturally I am the stupidly shiny blond on the left. It was taken at a time when I didn't feel like I was failing her... Without realising, I guess I felt like I was doing my job.

Except I like the 'job'. I love it.

Anyway. That's the end of my insanity post. No, I'm not going to therapy. I don't think like this all the time, and it's probably just because Gloves and I are really good friends, and I always want to help people.

Hatter xx

P.s. Plus, feeling like that is my purpose makes me feel better about the shit that makes me feel crap, because it doesn't really matter if the 'angel' or helper gets hurt.