Just made a bubble gum bubble the size of my face.

It was awesome until it burst. 

Cause foxes are so damn adorable.

The first 20 odd seconds are the cutest.

SO FUCKING ADORABLE.


I can officially add this to the reasons why I may one day get a tattoo of a fox...

Tell them now, dammit!

Okay so Nerd just sent me this video, which is a bit of a follow up to my post about suicide, and it has a message that needs hearing.

I know I'm a Christian, and it was made by an atheist, but I don't see why the heck that would ever matter. The guy has an important message, and everyone needs to listen. So many lives could be saved. To be honest the amount of swearing is ridiculous, but I hope the message isn't lost in it.


So yeah. Blame Nerd for the continuance of the topic.


Basically, if someone died - no matter how - and you would post messages on their facebook wall or whatever afterwards, take that message and give it to them now. Because now is when they are going to hear it, and now is when they need it.


That is the  challenge for you today. If you love someone, and you would tell them something if you lost them, don't wait. Tell them tonight, or tomorrow. But don't wait until it's too late.


He also makes another point.


Please please don't hurt yourself or commit suicide. You may think you are alone, but there are people who don't even know you that would mourn you with all their heart. It's not just your close friends you are leaving behind. It's the ones you have yet to meet or may never meet too.


Food for thought.


Hatter (and Nerd.)
xx

Lazing on a sunny afternoon...

^ Exactly how I have spent this weekend. And that is also a good old song from the 60s I think...
Also learnt these songs on guitar:

Good songs. Addicted to the first right now.
Hope life is good with y'all.


Meeting L at our new haunt the record shop tomorrow morning, so I'm off to bed.


PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE comment with something you want me to talk about. I get tired of rambling with no clue about what you want.
Thanks!


Hatter out x

Evening, Twin.

Sorry the last post was a bit of a downer, but I felt it needed to be said.
Done pretty much nothing today.
Now watching The Dark is Rising. It reminded me how I always thought I had a twin. A proper one, not Gloves or Sexy Twin. I don't. I asked mum, and she says I never had a twin or another sibling... so I have no idea where the feeling has come from. I've just always felt that another part of me (like another person, but connected) was out there somewhere, just out of reach.
Ah well.
I am twin-less.


Luckily, I have a lovely family, and a brilliant extended family :)


Maybe one day the feeling will fade.


Have you ever felt anything like that?


Let me know.


Hatter xx

I think it's time we talked about it.

Suicide.
The banned topic.
And the one that really needs talking about.


It's hard. So if you want to walk away from this now, that's fine. Just close the window, or tab, or whatever you are viewing this on. It's up to you.
I just can't keep ignoring it any more.


But... to be honest, I don't really know where to start. 


I suppose I should explain the clip, first. It's from Glee, Season 3 episode 14. When I saw this part of the episode, I was tearing up. It broke my heart. I don't know how anyone could watch that without feeling emotional. The whole episode needs to be watched really. There's so much more of this story that you need to know, but I figure you wouldn't really mind about the rest of it. So I thought you could just have that for now.
So... in brief. The guy who chooses to kill himself is called Dave. He's in his last year of high school. He is a regular guy. He loves sport, is intelligent, has loads of friends, but he used to bully this gay guy Kurt. Why? Because he himself is gay, and he hates that. He hates that Kurt can stand tall and proud about who he is, when he just can't. Eventually, something changes in him. He knows he has been wrong. So he becomes a much better person, trying so hard to make up for what he had done. But he is still to afraid to come out. He changed schools, and everything seemed to get better for him. Until his new friends found out he was gay. Their bullying drove him to the edge within days. As you saw, he can't take the pain any more. He tries to commit suicide. Fortunately, his Dad finds him in time, and he survives.


I don't really know what I am trying to say with the video. I guess it was just a way of opening your eyes...


A message from the actor: 

Even the strongest people can fall to the bottom, and not get up.


I don't know if you know how it feels to be on the very edge. I don't know if any of you have ever considered or tried committing suicide. I do. And I really hope you haven't. There aren't really words to explain how it feels. How it feels to have lost all hope, and all joy in life. It feels very dark. And it's lonely. If all your friends have walked away or just don't understand... well... it's really hard to keep holding on. I was lucky. I was so so lucky. Someone stopped me from getting to the point where I went through with it. Other people aren't so lucky. Some people don't get rescued. They reach the edge, and they jump. A whole, beautiful life... lost forever. Because they got pushed too far. And no one cared.


I know suicide doesn't seem very real to some people. People started complaining that Glee went too far by addressing this issue. I disagree. Suicide happens all the time. Successful or not, someone could step of the edge any second. And it happens almost every second.


Suicide is the leading cause of death, particularly in young people, both in England and Worldwide.
It is estimated that around 1 million people will die by suicide worldwide each year.
During 2008, there were 4,282 suicides in England, and there are at least 140,000 attempted suicides each year in England and Wales.
On average, there is one death from suicide every few minutes.
1 in 65000 children aged 10 to 14 commit suicide each year.


There are so many causes of suicide. Look here for some research into that.
It is rarely the same from one person to the next.
And just because someone wants to commit suicide, they are not weak. It just means that stress or another cause has overwhelmed their coping mechanisms, and no matter how hard they fought the darkness, it took over.


Suicide isn't that far away. But nobody ever realises that, because no one wants to hear it. 


But please... I beg you... Just listen.


Suicide happens.
It happens all around us, all the time.
But it isn't hopeless.
There is always something you can do.


NHS - Suicide - Help Others


Getting help yourself


The most suggested way of helping other people, or even trying to help yourself, is to just talk. It doesn't really matter who to - parent, guardian, GP, close friend, the Samaritans, etc.
But talking does help. 
I wish I'd talked. I know if I had, I wouldn't have been so close to the edge that only Ladybird could save me.
If someone you know, or even a stranger, looks like they need someone, just go over to them and see what you can do. Whether they want to talk about how they are really feeling doesn't really matter. Just try and make them smile. And if they do want to talk about it, let them. Try an understand. Remind them that they are not alone. A random act of kindness from a stranger or a friend can brighten a few minutes of someone's day, or even give them some hope. And that could make all the difference.




This part is to you, if you are on the edge, or having suicidal or self-harming thoughts...
Please, please don't let yourself get to the edge. You could have such a bright, bright future.
You may be feeling completely alone, but there is always someone out there who cares. That I can promise you. You are never alone. Someone you know may have even been in that same dark place. There's always someone to talk to, and there is always someone who cares.


Life isn't easy. I'm not stupid enough to lie to you about that. But it can get better, and as Kit and others like to remind me: If it isn't better, it isn't over.


Thank you for reading.

Hey y'all.

It's been a good few days really.
Lots of fun lunchtimes with my music boys, the consequence of today's being that Mad Harry now owns me O.o
We do have some great times. And they've all really welcomed me, which is so lovely :) <3
Keep getting pissed off with Gloves lately though :/ She keeps doing things that really get on my nerves, and there were a couple of days when I just couldn't stand her. I'm trying to sort it out with her, I really am. I was talking to Ladybird yesterday, and he said something that made me realise it wasn't worth fighting with her... Thing is, I'm still finding it hard to trust her. So because of that I can never be myself around her any more, and I see her in a very different light. I don't think we can ever be as close as we were. We can get better than this, but I think when she pushed me away she pushed me too far. And I just don't think I have the strength or trust to climb back again.
But hey. L, H, Unicorn, Lion and my music boys are keeping me happy and strong everyday.
So life is good really.


Love life utterly sucks. But hey. More important things to me right now.


LIKE THIS PICTURE



SO ADORABLE AND AWESOME.


Little song/poem I just wrote. Not sure what it means, but apparently this is how I feel tonight.


There's a sadness I can't shake
I don't know how long it will take
Until I can stand and greet
The sun, steady on my feet
Small walls, hide, the sight.


You lift me up to the sky
I know with you I'll survive
And when the darkness closes in
There's someone I can bring
To hold, tight, tonight.
Hold, tight, tonight.


I've watched you fall
I've seen you cry
But I'll break down the walls
And I'll hold you tonight.


Song of the day is a really sad Ed Sheeran song, but I can't get it out of my mind, so we are just going to have to end on a sad note today.

"Let the wild wind blow...

...let it rain and then
The clouds will turn and go
And the sun will shine again"


Chorus of a song by Tom Paxton, another voice of my childhood.

*Breathes*

Okay, so I've had a little chat with Brilliant and feeling slightly calmer.


Been addicted to this song all day. Even gave myself a break from school work to learn it on guitar :D

Someone had called 25th August the day that Smurf and I broke up, so I messaged Smurf to remind him (just in case he was confused too) that I did not break up with him. On the 25th I phoned him and asked for a break (i.e. a pause) in the relationship, not an end. We technically broke up last month, when he said he wanted to end everything and that he was over me.
Right.
Now everyone is clear, we shall move on.


Hopefully finishing my photography tomorrow! I have enlisted the help of Gloves and Giant One model-wise, as H and Sexy Twin never replied as to when they were free ¬¬.
My coursework is due on Tuesday, so this is going to be a very rushed, last minute shoot.


I'm finding not judging some people quite hard lately. But I guess because they seem to have changed so much lately, it is naturally a bit harder.


Back to school tomorrow... Yay. I'd say I'm looking forward to seeing people, but I'm probably going to be spending my whole lunch time editing photos in art, so I'll only see people in my RE and Psychology sets :/


Hope y'all are having a fun half-term.


Do you judge people? Be honest. Do you try really hard not to, but sometimes you just can't help it? Or are you strong enough to resist and never judge people?
Let me know.


Hatter out x

Wow.

So someone isn't as innocent as they claim to be.


Sorry. Slightly pissed off right now.


I'll come back in a bit.


Hatter out.